Hello, world.

When I was a kid, I wanted to be a writer.

I read a lot of books; and I mean, a lot of books. I was the book nerd, the kid who always had his nose buried in one and for whom it was an easy gift choice for Christmas or a birthday - get Josh a book. Along with some other experiences, the books I've read over my lifetime have been incredibly formative for me as a person. I would not be who I am today if I hadn't read the Lord of the Rings or any of the weird fantasy novels that my school library happened to have stocked for weird kids like me.

Because of my love for books, I believe that extended to my young mind wanting to replicate what I was experiencing. I can read these cool stories where some person let their imagination create a world that I can explore? I wanted to do that too, and reading and writing seems to create this positive feedback loop with one's imagination. I read things that make my mind go other places, and if those thoughts seem original I can write those things down so that I can build off of them later when my imagination runs wild again. The more I read, the more I can develop those thoughts which lead to more fantasies and fictions.

But what happens if I don't write these things down? The mind ages quicker than paper, it seems, because while I've spent my whole life thinking about what it means to be human, what it means to love, to hate, to fear, to do or think or feel... I haven't made it real unless I've written it down. It would be impossible to recount the times I've had a grand thought in the shower, or while on a run or a car ride, only for it to dissipate and never reappear because of the physical constraints of an aging brain that can only hold so much information in its immediate recall. An idea is only as great as your ability to articulate it and if all my ideas are lost to the void, what ideas did Josh even have? What were his thoughts? How did he view the world and how did he consider the people he interacted with? What legacy will I leave? I have not deceived myself into thinking that I'll make any visible impression in history on a grand scale, but I would hope I leave something beyond offspring.

So, I will write. It won't be the writing I wanted to do when I was younger - grand fantasy or sci-fi epics with heart-rending themes and relatable characters. Maybe my writing could be that one day, but thinking is not writing and I won't be a writer by merely being a thinker. My writing may be philosophy, it may be journaling, it may be an essay on my latest obsession, it may be the most boring, unrelatable drivel you've ever read, but I must write. It's a muscle of mine that's atrophied for far too long. So, I'm not really sure how to set expectations to anyone reading this. My writing may be irregular, trite, irreverent, or plodding; but you're going to get writing out of me. There will be little editing, there may be typos, my ideas may not make sense (and if they don't, it's your fault), and above all it may be completely uninteresting. Because, really, this is for me. Any profit you gain from this is just that - a little something extra.

It's also worth noting that this site is not just a blog, but also for me to display my professional updates as they're mostly digital creations. And if I'm a web developer with my own website, I'm of course going to build it myself. So, if there is ever any weirdness with the experience it's probably because I tried to be too clever about something.